Monday, July 30, 2007
*sigh*
"I grabbed a pile of dust, and holding it up, foolishly asked for as many birthdays as the grains of dust. I forgot to ask they be years of youth." - Metamorphosis
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Nothing else matters
This one is a continuation of my journal entry on June 06, 2005 -the previous post
Nothing else matters
Not even the breathe
on which I have been holding on for so long
Not even the sun
that has been telling me one day things will be different
Not even the drops of dew
ornamenting the most neglected leaf
seeing which has been giving me pleasure inexpressible
Nothing else matters
Not even the biggest wish come true
Not even the darkest day gone bright
Not even eternity passing by
Neither getting once deserved dream
Nothing else matters
But for you...
*eeeeeeeeeishhhh..these posts do bring back some harsh memories..* Glad I am moved on :)
Nothing else matters
Not even the breathe
on which I have been holding on for so long
Not even the sun
that has been telling me one day things will be different
Not even the drops of dew
ornamenting the most neglected leaf
seeing which has been giving me pleasure inexpressible
Nothing else matters
Not even the biggest wish come true
Not even the darkest day gone bright
Not even eternity passing by
Neither getting once deserved dream
Nothing else matters
But for you...
*eeeeeeeeeishhhh..these posts do bring back some harsh memories..* Glad I am moved on :)
Journal post Jun '05
Today I felt like digging out some posts in my diary and I stumbled upon a post on 6th June, 2005. It begins like this..
Things have moved so fast. It's already summer holidays and I am as lonely as I have always been before. Much has happened since I wrote the last page of my life.... {then I talk about some personal stuff ending with a poem}
Battles of sights stopped,
Flutternig of breeze halted,
I still remember the day you hold me.
Marathon of breathe froze...
I do remember those eyse
changing into an ocean of mysteriousness
as I walked with you
across time and space...
I do remmeber fishing for sparkles of love
that I thought might existed
in those eyes
which have been with me ever since I met you
I do remeber even wanting to see
the indepthness of anger
in those eyes
where the mysteriousness drove me crazy
I also remember wishing to know
what remained hidden behind the curtain
of those eues
on which I felt once and ever since then...
Alas, never could I figure out
any sparkles of love
Worst still yet
never did I get
even anger of real kind
Now tie and space of our meeting have cross us
and we have crossed them
but anchors of our memories
have remained intertwined
at the junction where if we look back
we will find ourselves
falling in love, once upon a time...
Things have moved so fast. It's already summer holidays and I am as lonely as I have always been before. Much has happened since I wrote the last page of my life.... {then I talk about some personal stuff ending with a poem}
Battles of sights stopped,
Flutternig of breeze halted,
I still remember the day you hold me.
Marathon of breathe froze...
I do remember those eyse
changing into an ocean of mysteriousness
as I walked with you
across time and space...
I do remmeber fishing for sparkles of love
that I thought might existed
in those eyes
which have been with me ever since I met you
I do remeber even wanting to see
the indepthness of anger
in those eyes
where the mysteriousness drove me crazy
I also remember wishing to know
what remained hidden behind the curtain
of those eues
on which I felt once and ever since then...
Alas, never could I figure out
any sparkles of love
Worst still yet
never did I get
even anger of real kind
Now tie and space of our meeting have cross us
and we have crossed them
but anchors of our memories
have remained intertwined
at the junction where if we look back
we will find ourselves
falling in love, once upon a time...
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Love
Love is an idea
but idea is not love,
for those who have loved
have an idea of what it is,
and those who have an idea
and havent experienced it
donot know what it actually is...
{I liked these lines..I came across it while surfing orkut..}
but idea is not love,
for those who have loved
have an idea of what it is,
and those who have an idea
and havent experienced it
donot know what it actually is...
{I liked these lines..I came across it while surfing orkut..}
Timid beauty
Sometimes its not the people I long for;It's the land, the beauty that fills up the void within me when I am home... Evenings like this...
And the Lord said;
"Let there be beauty"
and there was Ladakh...
Shhh... hear something? No?
Who says only living beings can speak...
this picture speaks to me aloud...
Coz I am leaving on a jet plane, don't know when I'll be back again...Now I am feeling nostalgaic..I should better stop..I will post more pictures... I should say I will sort out more pictures from the millions on the web. All images from http://www.nationalgeographic.com/ and somewhere else (I lost the page..see the hebrew on the edge of the last image..) and the last one is from http://couchtrekker.files.wordpress.com
P.S. the formatting in this blog sucks big time...Can't make it look proper..Sorry folks!
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
K.I.A.
K.I.A. highlights a light, cheerful, and funny moment that made me geniunely laugh after a long time.
I work in the lab. Every since I started my research this summer, I used to have the chemistry lab all by myself until recently, Marc - a freshman, who works under the chem prof. started showing up every afternoon. I have always noticed him as a very reticent person and I had never spoken to him before other than passing Hi(s) until this summer.
I had more knowledge of where things are stored in the lab, so I would help Marc find things and we started talking. One day, I was running a sodium fusion reaction when, in a split of second while I was thinking everything was going fine, one of the test-tube caught fire. It was because there were virgin sodium left after I thought I had burnt it all. I let out a huge scream (my huge screams are inherentely of lower decibel that perhaps wouldn't pass as a scream from a scientific point of view, nevertheless, it was a scream from my side). Marc came running from across the lab. I was shocked, scared, and yet I was finding it pretty hilarious of what had happened and was trying to explain it to him. In the middle of my explanation, I withdrew my eyes from the "test-tube on fire" to look at him and I saw his eyes fixated at my other test tube.
There were two test-tubes, one that I was holding in my hand (ofcourse with a clamp) and the other sitting on a stand. I had put methanol in both the test-tubes after I had burnt my compound so that it consumes the left over (if any) pure sodium. However, the reaction in the one that was sitting was extremely vigorous so that it looked pretty damn fascinating now that I think about it. I clearly remember the expression on Marc's face while he was looking at it (unfortunately, the victim of the incident didn't draw any attention from him...the burning test tube! haha..). The way he was looking at the other test-tube and the way I was still explaining about my other test tube somehow made me feel like kids. I felt like I had gone back to my childhood when you can't really hide the excitement of discovering something new, like when a friend and you would be walking and suddenly you would see a $10 note on the pathway..In such a moment you are both fascinated and at the same time, suspicious, hesitant, unsure whether to pick it up or not... You would be looking at your friend and he would be looking at you exchanging an unscrupulous grin...I felt that moment in the lab was just this... a reminicent of a precious moment in perhaps everyone's honest childhood.
Life would be too boring in lab if there aren't small (safe?) accidents. Accidents that freeze your breath, then bring a silly smile, and ultimately make your eyes roll left and right to make sure no one has seen you make that silly mistake. All these three responses mostly taking place with a span of a second! I am usually very careful in lab, so I hardly get the pleasure of such accidents, but Marc and such accidents seem to have become synonyms these days. The other day, he was churning something under the fume hood and staring at his flask throughout like a statute oriented to look at a fountain...or something. It made me wonder if he was even blinking. He looked so attentive as if his flask was going to abscond with his precious solution. Right then, the flask blew off, I saw him pull off his head with a jerk and I noticed he looked right and left, front on the broken flask, and then right and left, finally settling on front with a smile. I wonder why he didn't bother to look behind. I was standing behind him pretending to be busy with my own stuff. Inside, however, I was laughing. {I like to notice people behavior sometimes...we are silly sometimes, aren't we?)
He went off to the board where he had his data of four flask. He went to the last column, circled it with red marker, and wrote K.I.A with a sad face (smiley?) on the side like an improvised version of :(. He said to me, "look what happened." I said, "I saw..." trying to project an expression that would tell him I sympathize with what had happened to his beloved solution (actually it was the sad smiley he drew on the board that was helping me to provoke sympathy ladden expression on my face, otherwise, I was cracking up inside:D). I asked him, "What's K.I.A?" as I didnt see it anywhere else on his data. He looked at me with a sad face and I couldn't help but see the similarity in the picture he drew on the board of :( and his own expression when he said, "Killed In Action." ...Haha..right there and then, "the" geniune laugh shot right out of my heart, transformed into a smile, and was pushing me to let it out on my face but I was restraining it because I thought he was really said for the flask that was killed in action. But I felt my eyes really laughing, and when he smiled, I just couldn't stop but let full smile at the board, at the sad smiley, sympathetically :) at him, at myself for thinking he was seriously sad, bowed back to my lab book, nodded my head sideways, and fully smiled some more...
Afternote: I am not the only one who personifying everything and anything!
I work in the lab. Every since I started my research this summer, I used to have the chemistry lab all by myself until recently, Marc - a freshman, who works under the chem prof. started showing up every afternoon. I have always noticed him as a very reticent person and I had never spoken to him before other than passing Hi(s) until this summer.
I had more knowledge of where things are stored in the lab, so I would help Marc find things and we started talking. One day, I was running a sodium fusion reaction when, in a split of second while I was thinking everything was going fine, one of the test-tube caught fire. It was because there were virgin sodium left after I thought I had burnt it all. I let out a huge scream (my huge screams are inherentely of lower decibel that perhaps wouldn't pass as a scream from a scientific point of view, nevertheless, it was a scream from my side). Marc came running from across the lab. I was shocked, scared, and yet I was finding it pretty hilarious of what had happened and was trying to explain it to him. In the middle of my explanation, I withdrew my eyes from the "test-tube on fire" to look at him and I saw his eyes fixated at my other test tube.
There were two test-tubes, one that I was holding in my hand (ofcourse with a clamp) and the other sitting on a stand. I had put methanol in both the test-tubes after I had burnt my compound so that it consumes the left over (if any) pure sodium. However, the reaction in the one that was sitting was extremely vigorous so that it looked pretty damn fascinating now that I think about it. I clearly remember the expression on Marc's face while he was looking at it (unfortunately, the victim of the incident didn't draw any attention from him...the burning test tube! haha..). The way he was looking at the other test-tube and the way I was still explaining about my other test tube somehow made me feel like kids. I felt like I had gone back to my childhood when you can't really hide the excitement of discovering something new, like when a friend and you would be walking and suddenly you would see a $10 note on the pathway..In such a moment you are both fascinated and at the same time, suspicious, hesitant, unsure whether to pick it up or not... You would be looking at your friend and he would be looking at you exchanging an unscrupulous grin...I felt that moment in the lab was just this... a reminicent of a precious moment in perhaps everyone's honest childhood.
Life would be too boring in lab if there aren't small (safe?) accidents. Accidents that freeze your breath, then bring a silly smile, and ultimately make your eyes roll left and right to make sure no one has seen you make that silly mistake. All these three responses mostly taking place with a span of a second! I am usually very careful in lab, so I hardly get the pleasure of such accidents, but Marc and such accidents seem to have become synonyms these days. The other day, he was churning something under the fume hood and staring at his flask throughout like a statute oriented to look at a fountain...or something. It made me wonder if he was even blinking. He looked so attentive as if his flask was going to abscond with his precious solution. Right then, the flask blew off, I saw him pull off his head with a jerk and I noticed he looked right and left, front on the broken flask, and then right and left, finally settling on front with a smile. I wonder why he didn't bother to look behind. I was standing behind him pretending to be busy with my own stuff. Inside, however, I was laughing. {I like to notice people behavior sometimes...we are silly sometimes, aren't we?)
He went off to the board where he had his data of four flask. He went to the last column, circled it with red marker, and wrote K.I.A with a sad face (smiley?) on the side like an improvised version of :(. He said to me, "look what happened." I said, "I saw..." trying to project an expression that would tell him I sympathize with what had happened to his beloved solution (actually it was the sad smiley he drew on the board that was helping me to provoke sympathy ladden expression on my face, otherwise, I was cracking up inside:D). I asked him, "What's K.I.A?" as I didnt see it anywhere else on his data. He looked at me with a sad face and I couldn't help but see the similarity in the picture he drew on the board of :( and his own expression when he said, "Killed In Action." ...Haha..right there and then, "the" geniune laugh shot right out of my heart, transformed into a smile, and was pushing me to let it out on my face but I was restraining it because I thought he was really said for the flask that was killed in action. But I felt my eyes really laughing, and when he smiled, I just couldn't stop but let full smile at the board, at the sad smiley, sympathetically :) at him, at myself for thinking he was seriously sad, bowed back to my lab book, nodded my head sideways, and fully smiled some more...
Afternote: I am not the only one who personifying everything and anything!
Monday, July 23, 2007
Relationships:
I have met many people who are in relationships and who always complains, "my boyfriend is too possessive," "My girl friend is too jealous.", and other such things. Isn't being in a relationship different from being just friends because you feel possessed, you feel you belong belong, you feel that you are precious to someone that the other feels threatened if you show too much of intimacy with others...
For me, it is. :-)..
C'mon lets think about it. If the other person doesn't mind you hanging out with a bunch of guyz all night long, doesn't even know where the hell you are, doesn't angrily stare at you when you talk to someone else for long, is he, then, any different from an indifferent friend? Think about it!
For me, it is. :-)..
C'mon lets think about it. If the other person doesn't mind you hanging out with a bunch of guyz all night long, doesn't even know where the hell you are, doesn't angrily stare at you when you talk to someone else for long, is he, then, any different from an indifferent friend? Think about it!
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